Love's Pure Light
by getpitchslapped
Summary: Five years, five Christmases.


_**A/N:** Written as a secret Santa gift. _

* * *

**I**

Beca doesn't like holidays.

Beca and _other people_ never meshed well—especially when said people were her family—so forced holiday family time was just her trying to pick a fight that would have her sent to her room where she could seclude herself with her headphones clamped over her ears.

She's probably the only person at Barden who isn't looking forward to the break, for as much as she loathes listening to her professors drone on in the mornings and Aubrey bark at her in the afternoons, it's better than her dad's incessant questions and Sheila's passive-aggressive comments.

Aubrey works them twice as hard at their last practice of the semester, yet Beca still finds herself reluctant to leave.

"Any big plans for break?"

Beca startles at the voice behind her, nearly dropping her water bottle, and turns to see Chloe.

Beca doesn't fully understand why Chloe has taken such a liking to her. Beca might be less actively bemoaning her required presence in the group, but she's not entirely pleasant. Aubrey certainly makes it clear that Beca's attitude isn't appreciated, but Chloe giggles quietly at Beca's sarcastic comments and invites Beca out for coffee runs on the days that they have early practices.

Beca realizes with a start that she's actually going to _miss_ Chloe over the break.

"No," Beca answers, shrugging one shoulder. "Going to my dad's house."

"You don't sound very excited about it," Chloe says, wiping away a droplet of sweat that was making its way down her collarbone.

"I'm not," Beca says, making a face.

"Why?" Chloe asks, sitting down on a folding chair instead of making a beeline for the door like the rest of the girls (all probably worried that Aubrey will suddenly want to squeeze in one last round of cardio).

Beca shifts from foot to foot. "My step-mother's a real bitch and they're just going to lecture me about how being a music producer isn't a 'real job' and that I should be taking more advantage of my education." She rolls her eyes. "I have to pretend like I'm not planning on getting the fuck out of here at the end of the year."

Chloe's eyes flash with something that looks a bit like hurt—just for a moment. "I'm sorry," she says. "You can always text me if you need to."

Beca smiles a little. "Thanks."

Despite the offer, Beca tries to avoid bothering Chloe. After all, it's Christmas, and Chloe doesn't need to be hassled with the snide remarks Sheila made over breakfast or the disappointed look her father gave her as they opened gifts.

Music is playing so loudly through her headphones that Beca almost misses her phone chiming.

 _ **Chloe Beale:**_ _Merry Christmas! Hope you're having a good day! :) xx_

Beca smiles, something fluttering in the bottom of her stomach.

* * *

 **II**

Beca bangs through the front door of the Bella house, dropping her bag and shaking the snow out of her hair.

"A snowstorm in fucking Georgia," she mutters to herself irritably, fully aware that she probably appears strange in doing so. "In Georgia!" She kicks off her shoes with more force than is necessary, the boots thumping against the wall before falling onto the floor.

"Hello?"

Beca freezes at the sound of the voice. "Yeah?"

Suddenly, Chloe's head appears around the corner. "I thought that was you."

"What are you doing here?" Beca inquires, hanging up her coat. Chloe's hair is pulled up in a messy bun, her cheeks the unfairly natural pink they always remain in cold weather.

"My flight got canceled," Chloe says, gesturing to the snow falling softly outside the window. "I booked one for tomorrow. We'll see how it goes."

"You too?" Beca says. Chloe nods. "I guess that's what we get for waiting so long to go home."

"Hey, I had my research internship," Chloe points out. "You just were avoiding going to Seattle."

"My step-brother is annoying, okay?" Beca grumbles defensively.

Chloe just laughs. "Well, now we get to have our own Christmas."

Beca smiles, that fluttery feeling erupting in her chest. Her brain momentarily flashes with images of she and Chloe baking cookies while listening to Christmas music, and eating them as they open gifts by a fire, a crappy Hallmark movie playing in the background. Quickly, she pushes it down.

What they actually end up doing is burn slice-'n-bake sugar cookies before giving up and crashing on the couch with a bottle of wine.

Chloe drunkenly counts down to midnight (despite Beca informing her that that's for New Year's Eve), shouting, "Merry Christmas, Becs!"

"It's December twenty-third," Beca reminds her, the alcohol and Chloe's close proximity making her skin buzz.

"Same thing," Chloe says with a wave of her hand. She pecks Beca on the cheek before snuggling into her side to watch a movie, and Beca concedes without argument.

* * *

 **III**

Junior year, Chloe informs Beca that she is invited to her home in Miami for Christmas.

Beca accepts immediately.

Jesse looks baffled when Beca tells him the news. "You're spending Christmas at Chloe's?" he repeats.

"Yeah," Beca says, crossing her arms. "So?"

"That's very… relationship-y," Jesse says.

"No it's not," Beca snaps. "My dad and Sheila are on a cruise and my mom has the flu."

Jesse gives her a look but doesn't say any more about it.

* * *

"Are you sure your parents don't mind having me here?" Beca asks as Chloe smooths down the quilt on the bed in the guest room.

"Not at all!" Chloe says with a smile. "Jenny is here," she adds, referencing her brother's fiancée.

 _Yeah, but they're_ engaged, Beca thinks to herself. Briefly, she lets herself pretend that she is Chloe's Jenny equivalent.

* * *

Opening gifts with a family that isn't her own is kind of strange, and Beca worries that the homemade mix CDs she gives to Chloe and her parents are laughable compared with the generous gift card and custom-made Bellas laptop cover she received, but Beca actually feels at home in the Beale house. Even Jenny, who is kind of the dumbest person Beca's ever met, is enjoyable company.

It feels familial and homey in a way Beca hasn't felt since before her parents were married, and she has to excuse herself for a moment as she tears up unexpectedly.

She's just about regained her composure when Chloe pokes her head into the guest room. "You okay?"

"Yeah, fine," Beca says quickly, but it's clear that Chloe doesn't believe her.

"What's wrong?" Chloe asks, sitting down next to Beca on the bed.

"Nothing's _wrong_ ," Beca says. "It's just weird being with an _actual_ family."

Chloe nods sympathetically. Then her eyes glint mischievously. "Hey, I got you another present."

Beca frowns. "What is it?"

And then Chloe kisses her.

It's gentle, almost tentative, like Chloe is afraid Beca will run away. Once Beca registers what's happening, she leans in, tilting her head to the side and letting her eyes fall closed as every part of her body lights up. She rests a hand on Chloe's chest, feeling the rapid, rhythmic thudding of her heart until they part.

"You," Beca says, voice low, "are ridiculous."

Chloe just grins at her. "Merry Christmas!"

Beca blushes, wants to say something nice and sentimental, but panics at the last minute and ends up putting her hand over Chloe's face so she'll stop _looking_ at Beca like that.

Beca figures Chloe won't mind too much.

* * *

 **IV**

"Beca?"

"Hmm?" Beca looks up from her mashed potatoes to see her dad staring at her.

"Are you okay?" Dr. Mitchell asks.

 _No._ "Yeah," Beca says slowly. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"You're been…" He gestures vaguely. "…lost in your head all evening."

"Sorry," Beca says flatly.

"You know, it's too bad that Chloe couldn't make it," Sheila says, taking a sip of her wine. "I bet she'd be more pleasant company."

Beca bites her tongue and stands abruptly from the table, dropping her nearly untouched plate on the kitchen counter before retreating to her room.

Chloe had been scheduled to come to Beca's dad's for Christmas this year, but they'd had a nasty fight just before break. Over the Bellas—and Chloe's future, and how Beca doesn't "care enough"— _again_. Of all things.

Beca sits down on her bed and stares at her phone screen. _I'm sorry about what I said_ , she types. _I don't want to fight with you. Merry Christmas. I love you_.

She stares at it for several minutes before deleting the whole thing.

* * *

 **V**

"What is this?" Beca holds the large box, wrapped in sparkly red paper, up to her ear.

Chloe huffs (for the thousandth time). "Stop asking that."

Beca glares at her, pushing up the sleeves on the oversized hoodie she's wearing to combat the chill in their tiny apartment. "Fine."

She rips off the paper and yanks the box open with all of the patience of a five-year-old to reveal… another slightly smaller box. "Chlo, I swear to god if this is a bunch of smaller boxes…" She trails off, leaving the threat hanging in the air as she pulls out another box.

Chloe just grins, clearly enjoying Beca's increasing annoyance and frustration.

"Chloe, I'm about to—"

Beca falls silence as she pulls out the final box—a small, ring-size box.

"Chloe…" Beca repeats, but her voice cracks.

"Beca Mitchell," Chloe says, taking the box and shifting so she's resting on one knee, and Beca feels like she's going to pass out. "You are the most amazing, stubborn, talented, obnoxious, dedicated, frustrating, dorky, caring nerd that I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. You always see the best in me and want the best _for_ me, even if neither of us know that's what you're trying to do or say." Chloe chuckles, and Beca lets out a sound that's supposed to be a laugh but just comes out gargled. "I love you with every fiber of my being and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?"

Beca opens her mouth to speak, but nothing comes out, so she settles on nodding frantically until she finds her voice again. "Yes, yes, yes, yes," she says, over and over as Chloe slips on the ring. It feels almost surreal, but then Chloe is kissing her through a mess of tears and smiles and laughter and warmth and glitter and light.

And everything feels right.


End file.
